Our story of Jakob's adoption

I have had a few people ask about our adoption of Jakob. I didn't blog back then, but I have written something that I share with families interested in learning more about Ukraine adoption. Like to hear it? Here it goes...


The adoption of our son, Jakob, was an emotional rollercoaster…at best. A short 7 months later, we were on our way to Ukraine to meet our first son!

We arrived in Ukraine 9/9/01 and were quickly settled in to our flat…on the fourth floor with no working elevator. The following day we were taken to our appointment at the National Adoption Center in Kyiv. We had done everything we were told to do….buy nice gifts, have a little photo album of the life ahead for our child, dress modestly, and most importantly…be patient (much easier said than done!) We searched through 10 or more 4 inch binders full of profiles of children waiting for forever families…and didn’t really feel like any were meant to be ours. The psychologist in the office whom we were working with just so happened to “conveniently” have a profile of a child in her drawer that she thought would be perfect for our family. The profile was Jakob’s, and she was right in her thoughts! Jakob was born on the very same day we were married (so if my husband for gets a birthday he also forgets the anniversary!). We took this as our sign to go see this child.

We were in our flat waiting for our translator and car to come take us to the train depot for our overnight train ride to our son’s city. We were watching TV and it was showing stars on the cities of DC, NY, and somewhere in PA. We were not able to understand the words and all they showed were maps. We joked that it was no news that something was happening in DC and NY. When our translator arrived, they told us of the attack on our country. The stress level we felt at this point increased 10 fold, but we were still very excited about meeting our new son.

After finding a place to stay that didn’t have broken glass in the carpet and had windows intact, we were ready to go meet our new son. (Ironically, we stayed at a spa for pregnant women…I fit in, as I was 4 months pregnant at that time! My husband, however, was a little out of place!) We sat anxiously on an old green divan in the toddler house of the orphanage waiting for them to bring Jakob to us. They took great preparations to get him ready to meet us….bathing him and putting on “good” clothes. When they finally brought him in, it was love at first sight. My husband and I looked at each other with tears in our eyes, and reached out for our new son. Jakob had, and still has, the most amazing big, brown eyes with bovine eyelashes…and when we met him, they were very sad eyes. At the age of 28 months, Jakob weighed only 13 pounds and was unable to stand or walk. He was like a plant that needed a new pot in order to grow. Jakob had many diagnoses: rickets, giardia, developmental delays, inguinal hernia, urinary tract infection, and malnutrition…things that are easily addressed in our country. So, we agreed on the spot that we were interested in adopting Jakob. With smiles on their faces, the caretakers informed us that our next visit we needed to bring “pampers”!

In between going for birth certificates, passports, and other documents we were able to get quick visits in with Jakob. We walked to his orphanage, about 20 minutes one way. We had to take our own toys for him to play with, but he was most interested in the bottles of formula and pedialyte that he used to chase down the tasty goldfish crackers! The orphanage had beautiful trees and a garden where the caretakers grew some of the food for the kids. We were allowed to take Jakob outside for some fresh air and sunshine, but only with a snowsuit on! We were quite comfortable in the 70-degree weather, but you can never be too cautious I guess!

The day finally arrived when we were able to take Jakob with us. I was very nervous as we dressed him in a Winnie the Pooh outfit we purchased at the market. It was as if I was being tested to see if I was ready to be a mom as a crowd of 7 watched me change a diaper and dress my new son. At one point I knew I would fail this “test” because the caregivers were scolding me for not having any tights to put on Jakob before we left. We did have a hat, blanket, and shoes that were easily 3 sizes too big for his tiny feet though! The feeling we had of holding Jakob in our arms on the car ride back to Kyiv is one that will never fade. Without saying a word, my husband and I could look at each other and know that the other was thinking, “I can’t believe it…we have a son!!!!”

Our paper chase, court appearance, and travels were grueling as we thought we would never make it home. After a lot of crying-mom included, diaper changes on the plane, and sleepless flights we finally landed in Kansas City where Jakob’s new family were waiting for him with balloons and a teddy bear…and the beginning of his new life with his forever family.

Jakob is now a very active and healthy 8 year old…with a love for Transformers. He doesn’t remember his life in the orphanage, and we are glad for that. As we prepare to adopt an older child from Ukraine, we remember the trials and triumphs we experienced in bringing Jakob to a better life and hope that other people would consider adoption. The blessings your adopted child receives can only be multiplied back to you!